...continuation of 6th February 2008

i get shown to a room which has a sliding door half open...i peek in and there...there.....lying in bed is my sis, my twin, my life....my everything. The emotion i felt seeing her there my twin my twin with my nephew wanting to get out ohhhhhhhhhhhh i could have just knelt down in the middle of the floor and wailed with every single emotion i was feeling...........she had on a nightie and was lying in bed cant remember if strapped in but she was looking at me half smiling half wincing...........

i went straight to her and we kissed and put my cheek against hers and said 'oh lems oh twin it'll be fine it's going great' and when her face contorted with a contraction i wanted it to be me so as not to see her in pain...

a nurse followed suit and did something with a flebo which i understood was bringing on the contractions cos Jack was ready to come out but summat was stopping him and i held my twin's hand saying things and laughing and we were both amazed awed excited scared and everything.

Silv said she didnt know whether she was coming or going what to do etc and then all of a sudden two or three nurses came in and one of them, the one in charge, felt my twin's tummy looked at the drip and said 'c siamo' or summat similar. As she was doing this i was looking at another nurse who was preparing a trolley with sterilized things and then before i knew it i was sent to silv's left and told to stay put and this other nurse put her hand around silv's pubes and said 'ecco silvia spingi alla prossima contrazioni dai c'è la fai' and silv started singing ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh ohhhhhhhhhhh rock and roll robot cos the contractions were fast and furious but nowt was moving down below so they said she wasnt pushing hard enough and silv insisted she was. they were shouting at my lovely little twin my twin who was bearing down and doing her utmost and and and and and i could have paniced but i didnt i had to be strong for sis i had gone through this before i had to show strength confidence faith and ccc cool calm collected but i was shittng myself i can tell you really doing my head in cos wanted to get on that bed and throw myself onto silv and hug her tight til the cows came home...............

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh rock and roll robot
how we sang how we shouted how we held hands how we laughed and cried as Jack came out........his head first his scrunched up little face and his beautiful little body all facing me as silv lay exhausted back on the bed. my nephew my nephew my nephew had made it my twin my little sister strewth my baby sister had just given birth to the most precious wonder: Jack xxxx will never ever forget that feeling of sheer joy relief gratitude pride xxxxxx

6th February 2008

.....so i get off at the train station heart beating fast cell in my hand am looking at it constantly.....i walk into the supermarket in a daze and grab some water fruit biscuits yoghurt and go to the bustop. am in such a turmoil so worried so happy so excited so everything i can only picture my twin on her own on a hospital bed having contractions.......

san camillo hospital is famous for being first hospital in rome and consequently is pretty awful to look at run down v little organisation v laid back v dirty!!!
Once i found the maternity ward I ran up the stairs ( as i write this today 2nd December I am wearing the same stripey green and grey jumper and same jeans i wore that day!! ) and saw another dad waiting....i plonked myself on the stairs and texted my sis 'i am waiting outside can come in anytime'.

waited and waited gosh the trepidation...........

I even started pacing hahahahahahaah

Eventually lems texted me saying 'you can come in' oh my gosh i almost whooped with joy i was going to see my twin my twin my twin....it was about 11am by now i had been waiting for well over an hour......

I tentatively pushed open the door ( cant remember if i had all my stuff with me i think i did ) and there were doctors and nurses bustling shouts moans talking a general commotion!!!

A bossy nurse came up to me indicated a room and made me put on a sterilized gown with shoe covers. I was all in green heart beating outside my ribcage. Outside my ribcage.

i cant believe so much time has passed and i havent been able to sit down and write write write.....am always so pressed for time :-((((( will now finish the story - true story - of my twin-sister's giving birth and the arrival of Jack my nephew!